Dealing With A Miscarriage At A Young Age

Dealing With A Miscarriage At A Young Age

Miscarriage isn't a rare thing, unfortunately so many women go through it, but i feel as though younger girls are almost ignored when they suffer one. 

I lost my baby at thirteen weeks, when I was nineteen years old. I was told spotting was normal throughout pregnancy, so I waited over twelve hours before I went to the hospital, I waited until I was curled into a ball like position cramping, the bleeding had gotten heavier by this point. I knew I was losing my baby, you just know the feeling when it is happening  but I needed that confirmation from a doctor so that I could stop my brain from working overtime. From my experience; I felt as though some people just didn't want to acknowledge it as much as they would with an older women. I sort of got told by many people that its okay that I am i'm young, I have plenty of time to have children, and while that may be true it didn't take away from the fact i'd lost my child. It was still just so heartbreaking and soul destroying. 

The moment a woman finds out she is pregnant she becomes a mother, so having a child taken from you before you ever got to the meet them is awful, you have this bond, it'll always be there but its just not going to grow. I attempted to take my own life because I felt so worthless that I couldn't even carry my own child full term and thats when people finally started listening to me about what i was going through mentally, emotionally and psychically. 

It should have never got to that point. Its been three years now and i'm in counseling and on medication for anxiety and depression. I never got the support i needed from professionals at the time, I had an amazing support network of close family and friends but as amazing as they were I needed medical professional help. There is so much help out there, but i was never really made aware of it, I was sent home to miscarry naturally as I requested and had a follow up appointment to make sure there wasn't anything left of the pregnancy, but nobody really told me about the charities who support women through this, or the counseling you can have.

We need to reach out and support young women more, just because we're young it doesn't mean it hurts any less, we're still human we feel pain and heartache. Young women go through so much and going through a miscarriage is so hard for anyone so for a young woman just finding herself and becoming the person she wishes to be its something that can really mess with your head.

 

An Open Letter To My Sister

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